What to do in an Earthquake
WHAT TO D O IN AN IN A N E ART Mi Q UA KE BEFORE Conduct practice drills. Physically place yourself in safe locations. Like Wyoming. or W.V. Ignore all warnings. This guarantees nothing bad will happen. Remember, mind over matter. Know the danger spots: unsecured bookshelves, fireplaces, your mother-in-law's house. Carry a portable phone at all times so you'll be able to call for help from underneath all the rubble. HI REX-GUESS WHEPE IAM!" DURING Panic! Whatever you do, panic! This world can always use some more fear, chaos and violence. Charge admission. It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience and well worth a few bucks. Watch for falling objects, real estate and real estate prices. esseially nept AFTER it gurt Just Take a drive, get in the way of emergency vehicles, go thru' stoplights, give everybody the finger. You've just been thru' a very traumatic event: you have a right to act like a jerk. Help the economic recovery. Sell the rubble of your life as souvenirs to tourists. Throw a party for those who survived. The ruins, fires and sirens will provide a dramatic atmosphere, insuring a unique and memorable evening for all. Check for gas leaks with a lighted match. That way you'll explode, causing no further damage to anyone.
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